Six Do-Overs

Six things that I would change or take back.

-The major thing in my life that I would change would be dropping out of college. At the time it seemed like the only way to get some much needed relief from a whirlwind of stress that was carrying me away but now I am in a world of hurt because I do not have a degree. If I could return to that time I would kick that stupid boy that was giving me such a hard time to the curb instead of putting my education on ice.

-I would give so much if I could get myself into a time machine and jet back to a thinner me and force that me to believe in a daily/weekly exercise routine. I am so out of shape nowadays that it takes considerable effort to get up and workout, but I NEED it. It is just one of those things I wish with all my might I had trained for and continued with over the years to maintain that little figure.

-As we get older and our lives take off, sometimes in warp speed, we generally become busy and take some of life's little things for granted. When I moved out of my Dad's house I left my baby. Fur baby. Rudy had been with me for more than 10 years when I decided that I needed to fly the nest and unfortunately was unable to take him with me. It was good because he kept Dad company in our absence but I missed that puppy dog terribly. A year ago this past summer we had to put him to sleep after 14 years of being our baby. I wish I could have spent many more minutes with him than I actually did in those last years of his life. It's painful how much I miss him sometimes and I think of him often.

-There were too many tears wasted on stupid men over the years that one would think my tear ducts would have run dry. In retrospect, I would change that. I wouldn't let any boy/man make me feel less or unworthy at any point. I would force them to treat me the way I deserved to be treated or tell them to hit the bricks immediately.

-Part of me wishes that I had vacationed more. I have been to a few locations over the years but could count on one hand how many times I have seen the ocean. I also wish I had traveled with friends. I think this would have made for some amazing memories and stories that would have entertained us all for decades. I would like to travel and see all sorts of sights but now there just never is extra money for things like that.

-I would change the way the I have let myself go emotionally, physically, and mentally. Over the past 10 years I have focused on what I now think were all the wrong things. I wish I had worked on who I was as I was becoming an adult. This is no one's fault but my own, however; it is something that I stumble over often. I would concentrate on what made me a beautiful person instead of working my magic on others trying to help them succeed. I love the people in my life and want with all my energy for each of them to be happy, but I think their happiness and past relationships had become my entire focal point. I wish I had built myself into a confident girl because with that missing trait I could rule the world. :)